I didn't want to be his best man
by Esthernight
Summary: SLASH. Shawn's point of view on Cory wedding. Please Review!
1. Chapter 1

I didn't want to be his best man; I wanted to be his man.

I didn't want to be his best friend; I wanted to be his boyfriend.

"Choose Eric, he's your brother, he should your best man." I told Cory sweetly sitting on his bed in our dorm, my smile masking the real reason. Best mans, bride maids dresses, cakes, halls, it was starting to sink in. I always thought Cory and Topanga were a just playing house. I hoped that she would leave. I hoped Cory would grow out of this Topanga thing. I knew he loved me. I every time he kiss me, held me, touched me. I couldn't understand how this was really happening.

"Your okay with that?" Cory asked.

"Yea" I shirked. I couldn't be his best man. I couldn't stand there and watch the man who I love become someone else's husband.

Cory put his arms around me. Damn I love his big warm arms.

"You're the best person in world. I don't know what I would do without you." Cory squeezed me tighter. Damn he's strong.

"You're getting marred…" I nuzzled my face in his neck.

"Yea, I know." He cheered still holding me.

"Don't we need to talk? About us?" I whimpered.

Cory said nothing just squeezed me tighter

"Cory did you just hear me?"

"Please be my best man?" He said, "Shawnie, you're my best friend, please be my best man?" He nuzzled his face in my chest. Then he chuckled "We both know if Eric's the best man, he'll set something on fire."

Cory's hand moved down my back. He kissed my neck.

"Okay Cor, I'll do it."

That's Cory, always able to distract me. Always able to get me to forget all the serious issues. Always able to make me feel safe.

We raised our heads to each other.

"Cor…" I started but Cory pressed his lips mine and slipped his tongue in my mouth. Damn it, I loved kissing him. I've loved it since we were 15. We could talk later.

%%%%%%%

My eyes slightly opened to see 9:32 am in bright red letters. Cory was next do me doing the quiet snore I've grown to known. I grabbed my bed sheet and sank face into my pillow. I should be happy, lying here as a college student, the man I've love since I was 12 holding me tight.

But of course I'm too jaded, too hard to please, I couldn't be ever happy. I looked back at Cor, at the peaceful look on his face. If we could stay like this forever, maybe I could be happy. But this couldn't be forever.

We hadn't had that talk I wanted. Cory spent the last week running around with Topanga with wedding plans. The only time he spent with me was either bossing me around or fucking me. I usually wouldn't mind the second thing, hell usually I would have loved it. But I knew Cory was just using sex to get to shut me up. I turned to face Cory, he looked so happy and peaceful sleeping. My heart sank, thinking if this was going to be last time I would see him in the morning.

"Cor, why are you doing this do me?" I whispered.

"What?" he said still half sleep.

"Why are you marrying Topanga?"

Cory took a deep breath, "because that's how its suppose to be"

"Do you love her?"

"I love her, yea"

"Do you love me more?"

He was silent. Then he sat up, "We should be get going. We have a big day."

Either of us could ignore the elephant in the room.

Today was Cory's wedding day.


	2. Supposed To Be

**Sorry I haven't update this in while. I've busy working on my book (based on my fan fiction story It Wasn't Me. In case you're curious about it, here the link (I always reviews): **

** story/9761807-it-wasn%27t-me**

**So anyway here chapter 2**

"I hate him" I screamed stomping into the apartment where the girls stood around Topanga as they did her nails.

I hated all this wedding shit.

"I hate him. He's nothing but an annoying, whining, little, white boy."

Angela wrapped an arm around my waist, "What's wrong my brother?"

"Cory is what's wrong" I yelled walking into another room where Topanga wasn't, "I don't know what I ever saw in him."

I sat down on Jack's bed.

She sat down next to me and put her hand on my knee.

"You think on his wedding day that he would realize how hard this is for me." I threw my head up.

"Shawn…" Angela said, "I'm sorry but this wedding is really happened."

"Don't I know it" I smirked.

She brushed the hair out of my face, "Shawn you are a hot, smart, sweet guy. If you just let the word out, there would be hundred boys in line begging for you."

Oh yea, Angela knew everything. She figured it out and I couldn't lie to her anymore.

I shook my head at her suggestion, "But I love Cory"

She gently grabbed my hand, "I know, and I know that Cory cares about you too. But…look at what he's putting you though. I'm sorry to say this but if that man loves you as much as you say, he wouldn't be marrying Topanga"

Angela Moore, my voice of reason. She was so right yet so wrong.

I shook my head again, "You don't understand."

"I know Shawn." She nodded, "I just think you deserve someone who will treat you better. Just…at least consider it."

%%%%

I laid on my bed looking up at the beer in above me.

It was only one beer so calm down.

Cory's wedding was in half an hour. But I didn't want to go. I was mad at him. I was fighting with him.

"This is the last day we'll ever be Shawn and Cory, Cory and Shawn." I whispered to myself.

"But maybe" my head danced around, "He'll change his mind. But maybe if I put my foot down. But maybe if I call him out."

Then I thought, "But if I don't go I'm sure I'll regret it. Plus Cory will hate me."

I put the half emptied beer on my nightstand and got up to put on my suit.

%%%%

When I got there Cory and Topanga were already at the altar. Just like they've been for years.

I took a deep breath and walked to him, "Here, you're going to need these rings"

He smiled at me, "Shawnie you came"

I fake a smiled, "I couldn't miss this Cor"

"I'm so sorry" He whispered.

I nodded, "Well you should be, but we'll talk about it after the honeymoon."

Then he had to pick at the scar, "Wait what you mean I should be?"

I rolled my eyes, "Cory you've been a total jerk to this whole time."

"It's like you're trying to sabotage my wedding day" He smirked.

Asshole!

I got two inches from his face, "If I wanted to sabotage your wedding day I would do this." I grabbed him by his suit. My initial thought was to kiss him. Exposed him in front of Topanga and everybody. God that would have shown him. But…I couldn't. I just didn't have guts do to it. Instead I shoved him.

"I shouldn't have even come here. I have a good life jerk." I yelled walking away.

Then I heard him screamed out, "You too trailer trash."

My body paused as his words chilled me.

Cory was supposed to be the one person in the world that would never call me that. Cory was supposed to be the one person in the world that thought I was good enough. Cory was supposed to be the one person in the world that loved me for me.

That was the moment I realized that despite everything that he tried to tell himself, Cory Matthews was not what he was supposed to be.

%%%%%

I somehow ended up giving best man speech. I'll admit that I was proud of myself for keeping together.

"I may not be the best man, but I'm the best friend"

I laughed a little inside knowing the deeper meaning of "best friends".

"Cory and I have been best friends all our lives" I went on staring at him. Still questioning how he could fuck me over like this.

"We've though everything together. Life. Death. And Feeny."

Everybody else laughed. But Cory and I held our serious glances at each other. I felt angry. He looked nervous.

"But Cory and I can no longer be best friends."

And we both knew what that really meant.


End file.
